Hello everyone.
Thank you for taking the time to drop by and read one of my journal entries. There is no theme, just a flow of thoughts about what has impacted me recently, whether it be over the past few days, weeks, or the past months. I just hope that what I share helps someone.
I recently have been really trying to get my products out to micro-influencers and certain boutiques in my local area. But to be honest, I haven’t actually made the move. It’s been a while (like since last year March) that I’ve wanted to reach out to certain YouTubers and Instagramers that I really connect with in hopes that they would like my product and possibly share it with their audience. But there’s been a block. I think it’s fear? Fear of the very people that inspire me not appreciating what I have to offer. So I haven’t made the move. Haven’t hit send. I kid you not, I have drafted up emails and edited them so many times but never actually just sent the dang-on emails! I ask God for guidance as to why, and to give me clarity to understand what’s holding me back and to seek strength in Him to make the move forward.
I’ve gone through ups and downs with feeling proud of myself for what I was able to accomplish to feeling utterly discouraged due to what I deemed as multiple failures in a row. Certain simple things like not getting “enough” traction on a post. And I put enough in quotation marks because a dear friend of mine (hey Acey if you’re reading this!) reminded me of my why. Whose to say how many likes are “enough”? The purpose of starting my business was to help people find peace and an internal place of respite. If it helped just one person, then I did what I needed to do. The same friend also told me that the likes and that blue checkmark don’t matter, because if you’re your listening to your calling, your purpose has has already been verified by God.
When she said that, it really gave me a revelation that if I can connect with just one, I did it. Yes my goal is to connect with as many as God blesses me with but if I can’t learn how to help and reach just one person, then how can I do so for 15, 80, or 200 people? I realized that there was a skill that I needed to develop. Last year summer of 2021, I was in a slump, in a time of such discouragement, I didn’t even touch my business. I worked on my blog, trying to keep up with posting blogs and interesting reads but that didn’t even work either. And knowing that come August, I would have to go back to my full-time job made me feel even more discouraged and that I had failed at a goal that set out to achieve back in January of that year.
But my friend is a real voice of reason. During a phone conversation, I was low key venting about how I just didn’t feel passion for the work that I was doing. That I felt like had wasted the whole summer doing nothing. And she flipped and said “But you grew. Your faith became stronger. You are not the same Lachae today that you were four five months ago.” I can’t recall her exact words but they led up to “What are you doing in your waiting season?” Who are you developing into? What skill are you developing? Or it doesn’t even need to be that your actively working on developing a skill, maybe you’ve just realized that there is a gap in the and you need to figure out you need to work on it. Because as minor as it seems, all of that…is growth. It helps you develop into the person God intended you to become on this Earth.
To me, your waiting season is a time where it may seem like nothing is progressing. It may seem like your life is at a standstill and even though you’re trying to make things happen they just don’t work out. In this day, there seems to be so much “hustle culture” where everyone’s constantly trying to make a hustle out o something, which I’m not saying is bad. However though, if there is a moment in your life where (disregarding having a business)if something is going quite right: you didn’t get the job you really wanted, many unforeseen obstacles happen, “blocking” a great opportunity you could have had, or a rift occurs in a relationship. Take the time to reflect. There is a reason those things did/didn’t happen. Think about what led you up to that moment and just…pause. Speak to God. This, this is your waiting season. It may be a day, it may be a summer long, or even a whole year. In that time, what are you reflecting on? Are you ruminating in negativity? Maybe you didn’t get the job because you would’ve met someone there that would have deterred you from your purpose. And also now, you need to learn how to not let rejection hinder your other blessings.
I’ve learned that in times of discouragement, try not to wallow in despair or upset/ anger/ irritation. Try to understand and develop the skill that will help you transform into a better person. You know the saying that if you ask God for something, He will put you in the situation to practice it? If you need tp persevere, you will need to be able to handle let downs, if you need to learn how to forgive, you will be placed in situation (like with a close relative who has really hurt you) where you have the opportunity to forgive, even though it hurts. God doesn’t put you in situations you can’t handle. So, I think about my business not taking off last summer and it made me realize, there were more skills I needed to work on. I wasn’t ready for things with my business to get rolling. Or maybe somewhere, there was someone I still needed to connect with. So, what are you doing in your waiting season.
I’d like to dedicate this post to my good friend Acey. She inspired me to write it down.
I hope this helps. Isaiah 41:10
xoxo – Chae
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